They're all about you
 Is it really possible that he inspired this many thoughts/feelings/difficult questions and songs? That's right ladies and gentleman, yet another song about him...

Why it doesn't matter
 Does it matter what I say to try and convince him otherwise? No, because he's so wrapped up in the thought that it's him it doesn't matter what I say.

He said I've closed up, but thats for a reason... It doesn't matter the reasoning anyway because he just sees it as me trying to push him away. Maybe he's right, maybe that is what I'm doing... but it's not because I don't care about him. It's because I care about him more than I could ever say. Not being with him, not freely laughing and joking and smiling and having him by my side makes my eyes burn and heart ache more than he could understand...

But that doesn't matter because it's not about me, it's about him about me saving him from the inevitable pain. I'm not ready to settle down, I was leaving this town to start a new life, to start fresh. It kills me not having him part of that but we both need to find ourselves on our own before we can be there and committed to each other. 

Once again that doesn't matter either. All he sees is the pain, the thought that I don't want him, that he's not good enough, but he's more than I ever hoped for. More than I could live with if I dragged him away from home, broke his heart and ruined his new start too.

None of it matters because he's hurt and he has the 100% false impression that it was because of him.

Step off
 Step off woman. You had your chance and lost it. Accept the fact the one you walked all over is truly loved by someone and loves someone else in return. He gave you his heart and you broke it. I was the one that picked up the pieces and mended it, don't mess with another girls handy work because the heart is a muscle and when it breaks it grows back ten times stronger. Therefore his love for me is ten times stronger than what he ever felt for you. Move on girl because I feel the same. I'm in love with him and we want no part of you in our lives.

First Love
 I have always been the type of person to allow my insecurities get in the way, especially my fear of commitment. It's pretty big news that I have allowed myself to be connected to another human being who wasn't my family. For the first time in as long as I can remember I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time. He makes me smile like no one else can. As cheesy as I know it is I get weak in the knees when he's around. He's the first person I can tell how I truly feel and not worry about judgement. I know he tells me not to worry and a lot can change in three months, but I worry every day about what is going to happen to us when I move to Sudbury. It's so far from him and as much as I want to make it work, I worry that I'm not worth it. He doesn't deserve to go without someone telling him how important he is every day. I love him, really I do and I can't help but blush saying that whether it's typed or out loud. It's because I love him that I really don't want to risk hurting him. I just pray that things work out for the best.

High School... No more!
 I finally handed in the last of my summitives today! I shall mark this date on my calendar, as the day  I completed high school work. Wow, is it really done already? I can't wait to start the next stage in my life. High school, you shall not be missed :)

Writer's Block: Forever young
If you found a magical stone that could keep one person young forever, would you keep it or give it to someone else? If the latter, to whom would you give it?

I would give it to my God mother. My aunt is one of the most important people in my life and if it meant I could spend extra years with her it would be all hers. 

(no subject)
 Some guys are as dense as concrete filled swimming pools, don't bother trying to dive in because you're only going to get a massive headache. 

Males Trying to Prove Superiority?
 What is it with everyone wanting to fix me? Haven't they ever heard of the saying you can't fix something that isn't broken? This need to "help" me, with what? I have no clue.. It is entirely frustrating. Guys think that we will not survive without them and though, it is true I'd be pretty lonely without my guy friends I don't NEED one to make me happy. Especially when they are trying to replace someone in my life that is important. I have a man in my life, honestly get over it please, okay? Sweet thanks :)

Writer's Block: Your own toy story
Did you have a favorite stuffed animal, action figure, or doll growing up? If so, what was it and what happened to it?

I had a teddy bear that was pink and a blanket with bunnies on it that I called my bunny blanky... My bunny blanket remains in my room until this day as for my pinky bear she is in the crawl space awaiting liberation from the renovations in my house.

Why Boyfriends Moms are Blessings
 It was my boyfriends mothers birthday today and so I decided to get her a card and a chocolate bar. Didn't know what kind of chocolate she liked so I took my best guess. Turns out her favourites and my favourites are very much the same, that was the first partial success. To add to that we both like scrap booking. On top of that she doesn't have a daughter and so I feel more appreciated by her than I have in years. I've never seen someone so touched by a simple and cheap gift. To be honest, no one has ever made me feel so welcomed as she did tonight when she pulled out the baby books and she told me stories about when my boyfriend was little. I love it when people appreciate you for who you are. I have to say though sometimes she can be intimidating I care about this woman almost as much as I do her son, though in completely different ways of course.


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